There are two types of conversation: in a nutshell they are the amazing (good) and the pointless (bad)
For those of you who aim (and love) to talk continuously, the latter will normally apply. Needless to say, a pointless conversation starter can be transformed by a talented person into a good discussion, and so, from the rubbish starter comes an OK conversation. The amazing conversations come naturally (almost flowing) these are the the conversations that we all yearn for, the ones which build relationships. I love listening and observing people trying to engage in a conversations. Honestly I can say that 70% of what people say is pretty rubbish, little anecdotes, bad jokes, quirky observations, blatant statements and yet in the other 30% lies the magic, the bonding material, the stuff that flows.
Talking about bonding, I have my personal guide on friendships:
1) I've always found that friendships work better if you don't see each other every waking hour of the day!
one needs time to breathe and reflect, time to miss each other in.
2) Having said that there needs to be a period of time (preferably near the beginning) where you are together regularly, getting to know each other and this takes patience, effort and commitment!
3) Once that initial bond is made one can start seeing each other less, therefore establishing the boundries. During these times of absence its advisable to keep in contact via text, phone, or an internet chatting service.
4) Finding your own rhythm in a friendship will take time. For me, with one friend, we see each other roughly once every 2 weeks and text, chat and phone in between these periods. When we do meet, it's not over quickly; normally lasting 5-48 hours. Now this friendship wouldn't exist without our initial first bond (years back) However, I've found that the best way to sustain this relationship is the above rhythm.
5) Study astrology! I find the stars weirdly accurate; especially the star sign compatibility
6) Never give up! Even though there will be rough patches, there's always strength to re-build.
7) Know the difference between a friendship and a romantic relationship and if you ever won't a friendship to go those few steps further; seriously consider what's at stake, who the person is, what will happen if they reject you etc Marrying your BFF only really happens in movies (I've found)
That's it from me, for now!
Talk soon
Love you all XXX
