Isn't it kinda unusual to see a Goth listening to Westlife and ENJOYING it??
Ahhhh the things I notice..
Call me clumsy when I trip over a chair or fall UP the stairs but I know something's wrong when I see a Goth enjoying Westlife! Some might say that, noooo it's not unnatural to see a Goth being pleasured by the cheesy key changes of Westlife but to me anyway, something's NOT right! It's almost like a Priest that loves Death metal or a supposedly Vegiterranean greedily enjoying a succulent piece of juicy meat.
I promised you a piece on Prostitution, but scratch that, let's get festive! I'm really not in the mood to write a philosophical piece on the ins and outs of Prostitution. (Yes I DID just say philosophical but it'll probably end up more of a jokey light hearted piece. Also note the pun about the ins and outs.. :P)
Christmas is fastly approaching... As I've grown older, the magic has slowly faded; don't get me wrong, I still love Christmas, but the idea of an old hairy man sneaking into my room in the middle of the night doesn't conjure up the excitement as it used to. (I know what you're thinking and NO!! I am talking about Father Christmas here!) Also, the idea of receiving a few walnuts, chocolate coins and a tangerine in a long smelly sock doesn't excite me like it did either. Seriously, HOW do kids fall for these things?!
What I AM looking forward to is the FOOD! Yes, I may appear skinny on the outside but slow my metabolism down and I'd be one fat pig! I'm also looking forward to the cramped family gatherings and my parents insisting that we get the carol books out and have a drunken sing-song. And I mustn't forget the pudding soaked in RUM and my Gran gettin' tipsy and warbling on the table - while we're eating!
Maybe it's time for me to change my Christmas, go to a club, get blindly drunk, pick up some random slut, f**k her silly and then realise neither of us used contraception. Hmm maybe the partying but let's scratch the drunken sex, the unwanted baby and the STD. Hey wait! I've moved on to prostitution...
If I don't write before hand, have a stupendous Christmas
and if you come out debt free and without an unwanted child then I'll salute you!
Merry Christmas XXX
